The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

August 18, 2007

10:56 EST

He's sprawled out across the bed. He being my husband. Just now I looked over at him and giggled, his current body position looks much more like a 9 year old than a 37 year old. No inhibitions just sweet slumber. For a moment I look at him through a Mother's eyes wondering how many times his Mother might have seen him sleeping exactly like this? Then my mind does a fast forward a few decades and I think about the woman that might be sitting in the bed beside my son observing the same thing. Will she wonder how many times I might have checked in on him before retiring myself and seen that he's assumed the same position?

I spent the afternoon with the grandprince today. He's completely edible. I sat for almost an hour alone with him in my bedroom speaking continual 'baby talk'-- I can tell he's very happy there's atleast one of the big people that hover around him all the time that can speak his language! And I have mastered it. He's old enough now to hold a gaze and try to imitate speaking back, of course, with this comes some of the most beautiful 'ooohhhs' and 'aaaahhhs' I've ever heard. I love when he looks directly at me then begins to try and contort his own mouth to match the movements mine are making **insert more ooohhhs and aaahhhs' here. And for the grand finale he spreads his mouth open as far as he possibly can in the most angelic smile you've ever witnessed. He's as addictive as any drug could be.

As crazy as life can be it's simple things like baby talk and grown men's sleeping habits that make the ride a bit more tolerable.

Have you ever noticed that all television 'families' never purchase more than a quart of a milk at a time? I saw a commercial tonite for a new show and the family (of 5) was passing around a quart of milk! Granted not every aspect of television is well thought out and realistic, but good grief is there not a producer or prop guy out there that knows that nobody with any size family ever buys a quart of milk! Even the lactose intolerant folks have half-gallons of soy concoctions these days.

I think the same people that are in charge of the milk is also responsible for getting 'newborn' babies when needed. Ever notice that the bulk of 'newborns' are atleast 3 months old. Is there some sort of infant child labor law I'm not aware of? For goodness sake if you must have a 3 month old atleast get a small one!

Why even watch television, you ask? Because I like it. I read a lot too. But I need a regular fix of TV to boot. I've never hidden the fact that I particularly like 'reality television' but there's one show out there that has really been bugging the heck out of me lately, that show would be VH1's 'Rock of Love'. For those who have never seen it, it's Bret Michaels (lead singer of metal wannabe band Poison) on a quest to find the right woman to 'rock his world'. The cheese factor for this show is off the charts, it's kind of the white guys version of 'Flavor of Love'. Basically there's 20 or so girls (and yes most of them were either in diapers or pre-school at the height of Bret's career) fighting for Mr. Michaels' attention. Now I try not to judge people, and I have the same gripe about other shows of this caliber, i.e. The Bachelor, but I cannot figure out what kind of a woman would be content going on 'group' dates and taking turns playing tonsil hockey with a washed up musician?  I remember single life pretty well and I recall there was ample competition all the time, I simply can't imagine crawling in the back of a limo and waiting for my 'turn' to sit by a man. On my worst day I wasn't that desperate.

Remember, I want to watch television. In fact I would love to work in the industry, if I did you can bet you wouldn't see any quart cartons of milk on the breakfast table, nor would you see any 15 lb. newborns, AND Bret Michaels would be working his ass off to impress a woman!